The Third Look

Recently my brother wrote a review of The Prestige on his blog The Choked Blowhole.  Reading his review made me feel like perhaps I had missed the mark on this movie.  I wanted to like this movie.  I really did.  And yet, the first time I watched it, I found it wanting.  Second time I watched it, strangely disappointed.  Sadly, it got filed into the growing pile of disappointing movies not to be brought out again.  Until I read this review.

Let it be said at the very beginning that I am just a tad intransigent at times.  That being the case, there are not many individuals who could make me take a third look at a film.  Not wanting to be completely intractable, however, I decided to take one more spin in the magic box.  Needless to say, this is not an easy thing to do with this particular movie.  "Now you're looking for the secret... but you won't find it, because of course you're not really looking. You don't really want to know. You want to be fooled."  Unfortunately, once you know what the secret is, you can never really watch the trick the same again.

With mind as open as I could get it, freshly popped bowl of corn in front of me, I curled up on my couch with my newly rented copy of The Prestige. 

What first drew me to this movie was the undeniably stellar cast.  This movie has an incredible ensemble of individuals including the incomparable David Bowie and the fabulous Andy Serkis.  Then we go into the cast of main characters.  You can never go wrong with Michael Caine.  The man always delivers a stellar performance whether he's playing a butler or singing and dancing with the Muppet cast.  I first saw Hugh Jackman in X-Men and have been an avid follower ever since.   Somehow he manages to bring something different to every part he plays and I definitely felt like this was a new twist for him.  Finally, Christian Bale shows up as Alfred Borden.  What can I say?  Christian Bale could breathe for two hours and I would watch.  So far, I'm completely along for the ride.

The question then becomes, when did they lose me?  This is where I have trouble separating myself from my initial impressions.  Mostly because what turned me off the first time around was that I felt the movie was predictable.  I knew what was coming down the pike.  This time I really did know what was coming down the pike.  Instead, I tried to watch the movie from the perspective of what wasn't working for me.  Cast definitely delivered.  I could see how the story line developed as action led to counter-action. The characters were all believable.  And I really enjoyed the build up of action during the movie.  Which still begged the question what left me wanting.

Ultimately, I think I was stuck on two major points.  One was that feeling of predictability.  Perhaps if I had not seen The Illusionist first, I would not have been suffering from that overwhelming sense of deja vu.  Alas, just as I couldn't really go back with a blank slate perspective, I couldn't reverse the order in which I viewed these flicks.  Be that as it may, it's hard to buy into the magic when you know how the trick is done.  My other major hang up was the end of the movie.  I know they gave you a run through on how everything happened at the end, but I still walked away with questions.  Where did Cutter fit into the story?  Whose side was he on the whole time?  Perhaps it was just recognizing the ultimate body count in this movie.  There really is a lot of death.  It seems like it hints at much darker undertones that aren't fully explored.

Even with all the negatives, I will admit to enjoying the movie more this time around than in previous viewings.  My expectations were lower, which perhaps helped in the long run.  At the same time, I found quite a bit to recommend this movie which I think I overlooked last time around.  I'm not sure I'll be running out to add to this my personal collection, but I have a much more open mind.

Keeper of the Stuff

Some mothers claim that their title lies somewhere along the lines of "chauffeur" or "maid" or "cook."  While all of these may seem apt on one level or another, I courteously disagree.  My official title is "Keeper of the Stuff." 

It is a rare day in our little kingdom when I don't spend at least 20 minutes of my time hunting for some item that has made a mysterious disappearance.  Mind you, the closer it is to bed time, the more value this item has to the child in question.  Alas, in some instances, it is an item that I just can't argue with.  "Mom, where's my blanks?!"  Blanks being the blanket that my son absolutely will not sleep without.  That thing is tattered, stained beyond reason, truly well loved and still going to bed with my son four years after he received it.  Mind you, had we known at the time what great status this blanket was going to have in my son's life, we would have stocked up.  Unfortunately, we were too short sighted to make that call and now spend inordinate quantities of time hunting for aforesaid piece of material.  Once the item has been safely retrieved from the car, the back of the trike, under the couch cushions and once inside Jaba's bed (no, folks, you can't make this stuff up), I am able to finally tuck my son into bed.  Then ponder whether it is possible to attach a tracking device for next time.

The really mind boggling part about this title is that it's not just related to my child.  Some part of my brain can almost justify their dependence as they are too small to reach some of the shelves in the house, have a very short attention span and usually are not the ones reorganizing things within our home.  With the exception that my husband is almost a foot taller than I am, apparently all the above rules apply to him also. 

It is with frightening regularity that my husband asks me "where did the piece of paper go that was sitting on my night table?"  Friends, let me assure you, although I may be a little more organizationally conscientious (did you like that euphemism?) I rarely take it upon myself to reorganize his night table.  It's sort of like poking through my husband's drawers ... some space should just be his.  None of this, however, matters to my husband who is sure that I have moved the item in question with the sole goal in mind of making him search for it.  With a distinct lack of patience I holler back, "did you look on the night table?"  "Yeah, it was there.  Can't find it now."  Which means one of two things.  It has been moved by my husband, myself or one of our children.  Possible, but not usually the case.  The second option being that it is still there and has been buried under the mound of stuff that has accumulated on the furniture.  Usually, within two minutes of shifting the items around on the night table I am able to locate the desired piece of paper.  And don't ask me how I know which piece of paper it actually is; I am going to attribute it to some sixth sense that kicks in when you become a Mom.  All I do know is that every once in a while it would be nice if one member of my family actually made an effort to look instead of automatically bouncing the job to the Keeper of the Stuff.

My son is also infamous for this behavior.  "Mom, do you know where my truck is?"  "Which truck would that be?  You have about 20 of them."  "You know, the one with the really big tires."  While this does narrow the list down by about half, I'm still not sure to which one he is referring.  With increasing impatience he says, "you know, the one with the really big tires that looks like a monster truck!"  Obviously this is supposed to jog my memory, but I guess I forgot to catalogue that item.  Now he's really hopping mad at me and says "the one I got at the playground that time!"  Still with no clue what he's talking about, we go look in the pile of trucks which has been scattered throughout the living room, and find the missing item.  Don't ask me why he managed to overlook this particular treasure when he dumped them hither and yon, but it seems that only the Keeper of the Stuff could ascertain its true location.  Current crisis diverted, I go back to dealing with everyone else's stuff.

Presently, I find myself in the unenviable position of packing for five people to go on vacation.  There was a time in my life when I could leave on vacation for a week and take no more than a backpack.  True story.  Having just begun my task today, I already have two bags packed with snacks and baby food for the trip; one bag just for diapers, pull ups and swimmers; and now a fourth bag going with bathing attire and toiletries.  (Oh yeah, note to self, don't forget the floaties.)  Before taking off on this restful interlude I still need to gather together clothing for my entourage, outerwear in case of inclement weather, blow up mattresses, a pack and play for the baby, high chair and an untold number of blankets, stuffed animals and electronic paraphernalia.  Despite the lack of assistance from other members of the household, I hope to have us packed and out the door early on the morning of departure.  Somehow, though, I'm sure it won't be long before I hear "Mom, did you remember to pack my ..."  If it's missing, blame it on the Keeper of the Stuff.

The Communications Era

A few weeks ago I attempted to contact a company with questions about their product.  I'm not going to mention which company because 1) it's not really relevant to this rant and 2) you could interchange it with just about any company out there these days and the end result would be the same.  First I had to get through the obligatory phone tree.  I would be absolutely astounded if I called a business these days and a live human being picked up the phone.  After going through 32 possible combinations, none of which met my specific need, I began punching the "zero" button repetitively hoping to connect with an operator.  The recorded lady kept insisting that if I followed their phone tree she would be better able to direct my call.  She just didn't seem to understand that this option just wasn't working for me.  Reluctantly, she eventually gave in and redirected my call to "the first available operator."

It has long been a theory of mine that if companies redirected all of the personnel they have working in telemarketing to the customer service department, customer relations would improve by a hundred fold.  Think about it.  How many of you have seriously decided to change your insurance carrier because someone was kind enough to interrupt you during the one night a week you get to have dinner with your family?  Never mind the fact that you did careful research on all your options and have been a loyal customer with this company for years.  Persistent telemarketer calls and now I've changed my mind.  With dogged determination, though, they keep on calling.  And that flood of customer service reps is still an elusive entity.  I will continue to get 15 phone calls a day for Ernest Rice and I will continue to hold for 45 minutes waiting for the next available representative.  Yes, folks, 45 minutes.  I understand that my call will be answered in the order it was received, but 45 minutes?  How many people are answering the phone, two?

Unfortunately, the above scenario is just another evidence of what I consider to be the ongoing problems with the age we live in.  Now, mind you, I am fully cognizant of the irony of posting this thought process on a blog.  Allow me this moment anyhow as I mention my total astonishment at the fact that we now have more ways than ever to keep in touch with each other, yet no one seems to be building relationships anymore.  Seriously.  Think about this. 

People text, they twitter, they facebook, they leave messages and access a few other modern gizmos that I'm not familiar with while never actually connecting with a live person.  I wish I had a nickel for every time someone has said to me "oh, you missed that moment?  Well, I posted it on facebook!"  Lovely.  What ever happened to picking up a phone and calling?  Or even an email?  Something that says, "I was personally thinking of you and wanted you to be a part of this moment in my life."  Instead I, and the other 357 individuals who are lucky enough to be friends with them on facebook, can all find out simultaneously.  At the same time we discover that Becky just ate a sandwich.  And Trish is no longer talking to Tanya because of that thing that happened at the prom.  It's all public fodder. 

Maybe I should use the 45 minutes I'm on hold for company Z to catch up on everyone's facebook page.  Except I'm too busy using that time to chase children around the house, fold laundry, cook dinner and catch up with all the other minutiae of real life.  Which brings me back to the lack of live people.  Even outside of company Z, it seems that real people are hard to find.  There are individuals of my acquaintance who I have no less than eight ways to contact them.  Not a lie, folks.  Do you think you can ever actually reach them.  Why do we own all these modern gadgets if we're never able to get in touch with one another?  Which is astounding to me that I can never reach people on their phones because it seems like the majority of individuals have them glued to their ears.  Have you ever been to dinner with someone and they spent the entire meal taking phone calls from other people?  Guess my company wasn't stimulating enough?  Let's do this again soon!  And if you do actually connect with someone it's worse than trying to schedule an appointment with the doctor.  "Ooooh, the next few weeks are looking really bad, how about we look at getting together next month?"  Maybe they're trying to catch up on all their facebook posting.

A short while before Christmas I attended a parade with my children.  There was a lady sitting next to me and she made a comment about the parade or my children or some other friendly rejoinder.  I embarked upon a conversation with her.  Only to discover that I was standing next to the one crazy person at the parade.  In between talking to me, this woman was having a conversation with herself.  I briefly thought about backing away, but didn't want to insult her if she was really off her rocker.  I wasn't sure whether to be relieved or annoyed when I finally figured out she was talking on a blue tooth.  (Still say they remind me of those guys in the Cloud City in Empire Strikes Back, but that's just me.)  On the one hand, she wasn't the raving loon I thought she was.  On the other hand, here I thought I was connecting with someone and it turns out that she was talking to her friend Beth several states away.  Maybe I should just give her credit.  At least she was personally connecting.

It's the Little Things

We had a fruitcake in our family.  No, I'm not talking about my Great Aunt Jean.  Although, remind me to tell you that story some day ... I mean an actual fruitcake.  Now if you're like most families, you do one of two things when you receive a fruitcake.  Either you consume said fruitcake, (If this is you, please let me know.  We've been curious about who that individual is who actually eats said delicacy.) or you do what the majority of us do.  You paste a very practiced and very fake smile on your face while exclaiming "fruitcake!" as if you've just hit the mother lode of Yuletide blessings.  Our family, never being one for the expected approach, started our own tradition. 

One year my sister gave my brother a fruitcake for Christmas.  Or perhaps it was one of her children in a heartfelt effort to personally pick out a present for Uncle Dan.  Not sure really.  A little fuzzy on the details.  End result was that Dan ended up with a fruitcake.  Not feeling a need to consume this brick of fruit packed preservatives, he threw it on his dresser.  Where it sat until the next Christmas.  At this point in time, Dan proceeded to regift the fruitcake to my sister.  Not being one to be outdone, the fruitcake began to make the rounds to various family members.  Somewhere along its travels it added a t-shirt and a card to its entourage.  Both were appropriate to the fruitcake theme.  I'll skip the actual content to avoid impinging on any copyrite.  Let's just say they still bring a small chuckle after all these years.

Don't quote me on this, as I'm not sure exactly how the confusion came about, but one year there was some general question about who exactly was in possession of the fruitcake.  A quick replacement was thrown in the mix and now there were two fruitcakes making the rounds.  The mail system was burning up as the fruitcakes were mailed, traded and foisted upon unsuspecting relatives until the stroke of midnight on Christmas Day.  If you think we haven't already carried this joke too far, you're wrong.  One year, due to some unfortunate circumstances with a decomposing fruitcake (who knew they would actually decompose?!), a sponge fruitcake entered the picture.  Definitely the gift that keeps on giving.

Just to conclude this saga for those of you who haven't fallen asleep by now, the remaining fruitcake came to a sad and final end this past year.  Thinking that I was being organized, I packed the fruitcake away with the Christmas decorations in the attic.  Thus, I reasoned, I will remember to pass the fruitcake along come the holiday season.  Unfortunately for the fruitcake and our enduring family tradition there turned out to be some hungry furry occupants in our attic.  Just to make sure this piece of baked perfection comes to a fitting end, I am now in the process of writing an obituary, placing it in a sympathy card and passing it along with my condolences to my brother, Dan.  'Tis a sad day indeed.

Silly Emmet ... Legos are for Kids

It's not often that I actually get the opportunity to see a movie while it's still in the theaters.  It makes perfect sense that when I do it turns out to be a children's movie.  This weekend, I had the opportunity to take my son on a date.  Which, if you never have the chance to do this with your child, I highly recommend it.  There are all sorts of things going on in my boy's head I never get the chance to hear.  Ask Uncle Dan who is now on the hook for a Robot Car and a Batman Car.  But I digress.

Date for us was dinner and a movie.  Not bad in the grand scheme of things.  Question was, which movie to see.  There is not a great variety of children's movies to see right now.  One of them he had already seen, the other one didn't really grab my interest, so we went for what was behind curtain number three.  To be honest, one of the big selling points for this movie was the time it was available for viewing.  After nap time with a good shot at getting into bed at a decent hour.  Don't you love my filtering process?  It could be Friday the 13th Part 27 and I'd be thinking "yeah, we can grab a dog at the theater and still hit bed by 8:30.  Let's do it."  Again, I digress.

You're probably wondering by now what we actually did see.  For those of you still in the dark, it was the Lego Movie.  Let me start out by saying, this movie was fun!  The guy at the popcorn line said it was a blast.  I'm not saying that he's God's reincarnation of Siskel and Ebert or anything, but I figure if you're working at a theater, you've probably seen quite a few films.  Hence, you're entitled to your two cents.  I must say, I agree with the popcorn guy. 

First of all, how can you go wrong with an entire movie about Legos?  Anyone who has watched the Camelot short on Monty Python knows that Lego films are just good clean fun.  I couldn't stop laughing as they simultaneously capitalized on Lego humor, pulled out every movie stereotype available and managed to wiggle in a message about creative thinking.  With all the motion picture characters they managed to squeeze in there, I can assure you that you will not miss the one or two they left out.  Not wanting to ruin all the surprise appearances, I will type no more now.  Except to say that Batman is better than ever.

Casting for this movie was well done.  Can't say that any one Lego stood out in my mind, but then again, you're just supposed to be having fun watching Legos, right?  In my humble opinion, I should not be sitting there thinking "hey, that's Morgan Freeman!".  I just want to watch Vitruvius dispensing his bits of Lego wisdom.  Definitely a success for the little yellow guys; I mean, nicely done to the voices behind the plastic faces.  One special nod to Anthony Daniels who I was pleased to hear reprise his role -- way to keep it going! 

My only criticism of this movie isn't even so much a criticism as a note for other parents.  While I enjoyed the movie, I really don't think it's geared towards children.  And I don't mean that in the sense that there was a lot of off-color humor or violence in the movie.  There's a bit of violence, but it's Lego violence.  Nothing bloody.  There's perhaps a few objectionable words, but again, these are four-year-old objectionable (i.e. "stupid") and not cringing in my seat because my child is walking out of the movie with a new vocab.  My real objection is that a lot of the humor is right over my son's head.  While he definitely enjoyed the movie, and got sucked along by the action, he missed a lot of the humor that had me rolling in my seat.  Perhaps that's a nod to the movie makers that we could both enjoy it on our own level, but a shame that he doesn't get why the Kragle was such a menace. 

Overall, I have to agree with popcorn guy.  This movie was a blast.  Maybe next week, I can give you a review on 3 Days to Kill.  Looks like there's a good showing right between nap time and bed time ...

In the Blink of an Eye

It has been exactly three years to the day since I last posted on this site.  Outside of moving five times, giving birth to two children, buying a new house and starting a new career, I seriously can't fathom what we've been doing to fritter our time away.  This was a venue which, for multiple reasons, I never saw myself returning.  Recently, however, my brother started a blog called the Choked Blowhole.  I find his writing to be amusing and highly entertaining.  For those of you interested you can find him at http://thechokedblowhole.wordpress.com/  Additionally, he revived in me the desire to express myself. 

Perhaps it is the lull of communications between myself and anyone over the age of four.  Perhaps it is a desire to download some of the thoughts pinging around in my brain at two a.m.  Or maybe it is the inflated ego needing a voice when people tell me that I really should write.  If you'll notice, there has been a change in name since my last postings.  One that I think much better reflects the new style of my blog.  Everything you find here really reflects a series of conversations.  Not necessarily coherent at all times.  Perhaps no main theme.  And probably digressing all over God's green earth.  I'm not billing this blog as prophetic or brilliant or even semi-coherent.  It's really just a reflection on some of the moments in life that strike me as funny.  A need to pontificate about the world at large.  There may, on occasion, be a post of some actual use regarding life as a military spouse, decorating conundrums or how to practically expand your family while moving into smaller quarters.  I wouldn't count on it, though.  I won't even promise to post on any sort of regular basis, although I am optimistically shooting for once a week.  For the most part I hope to find some threads of commonality in the everyday life while hopefully entertaining a few hardy folks.  Those of you still wishing to follow along, strap in, because Mr. Toad's Wild Ride is about to depart.

Vendicari

Now that we're getting ready to leave, Ben and I are finding great new things to do here in Sicily. Things that we're thinking, why didn't someone tell us about this sooner?

Our most recent adventure was to Vendicari. Ben and I don't own a GPS, and the person who was supposed to come through with directions well, didn't. Armed with a rough idea of where we were heading, we set out in the old Fiat Marea Weekender. It wasn't too hard to get there as we managed it in one try. Although, admittedly, we did feel as if we might be lost for a short while. After winding down several roads that looked like they were going no where, we started seeing signs for the nature reserve.

What a wonderful place to spend an afternoon. It is really not like anything else I've seen in Sicily. There were lovely little lakes, birds flying around, some lovely little ruins, a small stretch of beach ... I could go on, but you get the idea. The really nice part was that there were some great paths which made it easy for both stroller and baby to get around.

Or sometimes, baby with stroller. One of Gabriel's great joys in life is trash collecting. It's nice to know that my son is prepping for his future career in the janitorial arts. Personally, I'll encourage this goal. I figure he'll be making the world a prettier place, pursuing gainful employment and getting into a field that is always in demand. What more could you want for your child? His latest brain storm is to push around the stroller
while he collects his treasures. This way he's got the basket in the back to catch everything for him along the way.

Amongst his new treasures was his very first sea shells. We had taken him to the beach during our time here in Sicily, but it was rather densely populated. Not a lot to be found in the sea shell lines. Ben and I felt that we really needed to hold onto them. He really seemed intrigued by the waves and the sand. He especially enjoyed running up and down the little ramps that led to the beach area. I really enjoyed looking at the view with him, but I loved watching him and his Papa walk down the path together towards the sand.

Our last stop for the day was the visitor's center. Which it turns out was not opened. Not sure if it was closed for the weekend or just at that hour of the day. Either way, it was just as lovely looking at the buildings as the sun was setting in the back ground. The one building used to be a fishery. Now I know this has something to do with the fish that were caught in the area, but I would have to read the sign again to say exactly what. In the interim, I won't pretend to be an expert.

Gabriel had a grand time running around, climbing up the steps and, I'm not sure he was supposed to be doing this, but running through the fences. After all, they were perfect Gabriel size! The last picture shows this block that Gabriel was bound and determined to get on top. The
block is actually a little bit bigger than it looks in the picture and he had a brief moment where his little legs were just flailing wildly in the air behind him as he struggled to pull himself up. As you can see, he managed the feat. Once he made it to the top of his hard earned perch, he really liked taking in the view. I couldn't help thinking of Tattoo as he looked up in the sky and pointed to show us the passing plane. I guess if janitor falls through he can always try out for television?

Happy Birthday, Baby Boy

I'm only two months late on this. However, my pledge for the New Year is to stop feeling guilty about what I'm not doing. So here's my positive spin. I'm so glad I had a little extra time today to post this. Here's Gabriel's birthday day:


An early morning walk around the neighborhood. Weather is still nice in October.

Playing with toys at a friend's house.

Naptime is very important.
Figuring out how to open presents. Thanks for the blocks, Grandpa!
Opening his second present (foam letters from Grandma) and tasting the blocks. Yummmm.
A firetruck of my very own!
Taking the new ride for a spin.
One of his favorite foods. Pizza for lunch.
Rearranging the furniture at the mall.
Not everyone likes people singing to them while burning pies are put in their face.
Trying on Malvina's shoes.
Peek-a-boo!
Birthday bath.

Don't forget story time before bed.

Night, night, Gabriel. Happy Birthday, Baby Boy.

Dining In

One evening we decided to have an impromptu picnic on the carpet. Gabriel seemed to enjoy the concept of eating outside of his high chair. We even took the precaution of putting a towel down first. As you can see from the picture, our precaution didn't help much. It was a fun experience, but we think we're going to try the next picnic outside!

Summer Living

I realized this morning that I have not posted a blog all Summer. In order to make up for this, I thought I'd do a sort of Summer in retrospect. So here are some of my favorite moments from the Summer and a short bit about what we've been doing.

Keeping the peace in our community.

Yes, I DO like sweet potatoes.

Hanging out with the girl next door.

Bonding with Papa.

More girl time. Saying goodbye to Molly.

Taking the Harley for a cruise.

Discovering the sprinkler. Who knew he'd like it?


Lounging in the pool.

Climbing trees.

Visited the aquarium. He was fascinated by the jelly fish.

Down on the farm.

Gabriel may agree with his Papa that Denny's IS the greatest place on earth.

First visit to an amusement park.

Saw a parade. Went to see the horses up close afterwards. Although he likes them in his Touch and Feel book, he wasn't as fond of them in person.

And totally wore ourselves out playing in the Summer sun and water.

It's been a busy, exciting and adventurous Summer. Even more so, exploring everything for the first time with our son who is doing his own three-legged crawl, trying to walk and learning something new every day. And the Summer is not yet over ...

Five Favorite Italian Words

My friend, Lori, over at Cradle and All tagged me on this post. Lori did such a great job on hers that I wanted to have something equally inspiring to share. My Italian, unfortunately, is very limited, and what I do know I don't seem to be able to spell. However, in the spirit of good sportsmanship, I shall give it a whirl.

1. Mezzo - This may not seem like that exciting a word to you, but I was thrilled to find out how to say half. Considering that a kilo is equal to 2.2 pounds, I kept coming home from the market with a lot of fruit. The use of this word cut my fruit purchases in half -- literally.

2. Come stai? Actually more of a phrase than a word, but I love these two little words. One, because they were two of the first words I learned in Italian. Two, because they open a world of conversation. Even if they remain two of the only words I know, most of the Italians I have met remained thrilled that you make half an effort. Or should I say a mezzo effort?

3. Stanca - An all purpose word. If you're ever doing less than bene when someone asks you come stai, this word seems to be a sufficient response. It also seems to cover the situation well when baby boy is being fussy and I don't know how to tell them he's teething. Although recently I learned that has something to do with dente.

4. Allora - I swore when I first heard this word that I would start using it more often. It means "then" or "now then." I'm not sure when I would use it exactly, although the Italians seem to use it when moving on to their next point or trying to get everyone's attention. Personally, I just think it sounds neat. Especially when Andrea says it with his Australian accent.

5. Capisce - To this day I can't help but laugh every time I hear this word as I think of Rick Moranis and Steve Martin who say "capeesh." Actually, the verb is pronounced "cuh-pees-kay" but like a lot of other Italian words, the ending gets a bit slurred. Which is why everyone still tells each other "graw-zee!" "Don't say it. It hurts my ears when you say it."

Now I'm supposed to tag a couple of people for this post, so I shall tag my sister who was attempting valiantly to learn Italian before her visit and my friend Roni if she still drops in on my site. For now ... Ciao!

Keeping the Distance Out of Long Distance

My sister asked me to write something on this topic quite a while back. As you can see from the date of this post (versus the actual post date) it was quite a while back. What is it they say about good intentions? Which is probably a nice segue into my chosen topic ...

Before I start writing, allow me to say that none of this comes from a preachy perspective. I will assure you that any input I have on this topic is from experience and not from a degree in Relationship 101. One of the main lessons I have learned is that just because it works for me does not mean it works for everyone. The amazing thing about relationships is that they are all so unique and it takes something unique to keep each of them going. With that said, allow me to offer some suggestions for those of you attempting to keep a relationship going while many miles apart ...

First of all, and I can't stress this enough, you have to make a decision at the beginning of the relationship. Whether you are 3,000 miles apart or just separated by the activities of daily life, there has to be a decision that you are together as a couple. No matter what comes your way, you're going to work through it. I know this sounds elementary, but that basic decision will carry you through many a rough time when it just seems easier to give up. Or, times that aren't so tough when you just seem to drift apart. Either way, it's work. Hopefully this is as preachy as I get, but I know this was the hardest part for Ben and I. Deciding that no matter what came our way there was no walking away.

Now here were some of the fun things that Ben and I did to keep things rolling through the separation:
1) Ben and I got on the same cell phone plan. This allowed us to talk for as long as we wanted every day. If one of you is overseas, this option doesn't work, but it isn't bad for in the States. Overseas you may want to look into a plan like Skype.
2) Using and abusing that cell phone plan, Ben and I got on the phone and played board games. Being the computer age, you can also exercise that option online through sites like Yahoo games which allow interactive play.
3) The circle book was a great idea on the part of my husband. Here's the concept ... One person starts the book. You can write a letter, put in a picture, compose a poem ... whatever makes your own personal heart soar. Then mail that book to the other person. That person will add something to the book and mail it back to you. At the end of your separation you will have a sort of journal of your thoughts, hopes, prayers and dreams while you were apart.
4) Along those same lines, I did a scrap book for my husband to take with him on deployment. I figured if I didn't want him looking at other women, I'd send him along with reminders of me. It was based on a calendar concept, so he had a new picture for each month.
5) My sister and her husband actually inspired this one. One year for Christmas I sent him a sort of Advent Calendar of presents. It started on the first day of Christmas and went to the 25th. Each day had a number that corresponded with that day of December. For example, the first day was one book to read. Day 12 may have been a 12 ounce coffee mug. Day 15 may have been 15 pieces of stationery. I honestly don't remember them all right now, but it gave him something fun for the month of December and I had fun getting creative.
6) Care packages are always a plus. I like baking, but you can also send little things like stationery and stamps, razors, a favorite soap, a nice loofah, etc.
7) Use this opportunity to talk. Since we couldn't do the physical things in a relationship like go to dinner or snuggle up on the couch and watch a movie, we talked about things that were important to us. Some nights we talked about where we wanted to go in the future, some nights we talked about where we wanted to live down the road, some nights we just covered issues that we had never taken the time to talk about before. There is an immense blessing in having time to talk which is something that often gets pushed to the side in the rush of every day life.
8) Plan a romantic weekend somewhere. Try to find a weekend where you can both get away and meet up somewhere. It's like a little honeymoon.
9) If number eight isn't possible then have a date night apart. I know this isn't quite as nice as a date night in person, but here's the concept. Both of you pick a spot to go. It can be a restaurant you both love, a park bench or just a place to stare at the moon. Take the time to write each other a letter during that time. Write about what you would be doing if you were there with each other right then. Plan on doing those things when you get back together and anticipate that moment.
10) Keep a thankful journal. Log down each day at least one thing that you are grateful for about that person and one thing you are grateful for in your relationship. One thing about being separated is that it should give you new appreciation for the person you are without. Hold on to that journal for the rough days. A relationship savings account, if you will.
11) Do a top ten list. This is one of my husband's and my favorite dates. We both made a list of our top ten favorite movies and top ten favorite books of all time. If you want, you could do it with songs, poems, sermons, whatever. We then exchanged our lists and watched all the movies and read all the books on the other person's list. Afterwards, it gave us a new topic of conversation.
12) Plan a date. If you can't do the weekend together now, plan the ideal weekend for the return. Anticipation is a great spice to a relationship. And then make it happen.
13) Communicate, communicate, communicate. One of the advantages to our modern world is that there is a plethora of ways to communicate. Send an email, write a letter, make a phone call, get on skype, use MSN, but keep those lines of communication open.

This is a baker's dozen worth of ideas to help you get started. They were some of the ones that worked for us. I can't emphasize enough that now is a good time to remember what adds that spark to your own personal relationship. Remember what it was that brought you together in the first place and take time now to renew that bond. When you get back together, you can be grateful for the opportunity even if the separation was hard.

Baby versus Cat

My cat and my baby have a lot in common. It may seem wrong comparing my only child to the family pet, but it is, alas, a statement of fact. Let me give you some examples.

1) Both of them put everything in their mouth that is within their reach.
2) They both like small furry objects.
3) If it is moving, and within grasp, they will more than likely grab onto it.
4) They can both be tempermental for no apparent reason.
5) Although they may disturb your sleep often, it is not advisable to disturb their sleep.
6) The same rule applies for eating.
7) They both eat several small meals a day.
8) Bath tub equals good time.
9) Jing and Gabriel are soft, warm and cuddly.
10) They're a bit quirky, but I adore them both.

I'm sure I could think of more examples, but these are probably the top ten right now. My son is quite fond of our kitty cat. He seems to find her quite amusing. One night, for no expected reason, he started giggling at the sight of our kitty. He and Ben proceeded to "chase" Jing around the house while Gabriel laughed. Unfortunately, Jing wasn't quite so amused. Now here's the really funny part ... our cat ran. This may not seem like a big deal to those of you who don't know our cat, but she's been known to tree grown men. And here she was running from our five month old son. Well, at least one of them was having fun.

That's the Plan

Baby Boy is doing pretty well with sleeping. He goes to bed at 7 p.m. every night without fuss. I can not tell you how many times Ben and I have thanked God for that little blessing. He wakes up once a night. Not horrible in the grand scheme of things. His clock, however, seems to have gotten stuck at this four a.m. time slot. Rise and shine is at 6 a.m. every day. And every morning my son insists upon rising between 4 and 4:45 for a little snack. We've tried everything at this point. We've fed him more before bed at night, we've fed him less, we've put him to bed earlier, we've put him to bed later, we've tried not feeding him and just rocking him or patting his back, we've tried letting him cry, we've tried getting him up for a late night "topper" ... I can't tell you how many things we've tried. He's stuck. I've come to the conclusion that I'm going to be breastfeeding my son at 4 a.m. for the rest of our natural born lives.

We've talked with him about this. Ben and I set him down on the changing table and explained that if he sleeps for just one hour more, he can get up for the day. He'd be happier, Mommy would be happier, everyone would be happier! So for now on he is going to sleep until 6 a.m. and then get up and eat. That's the plan. He smiles at us in the most accommodating manner and continues to alert us to his presence at 4 a.m.

Recently my son came to me and said, "Mama, I'd like to discuss the current nap arrangement. Up until now we've been doing a four nap a day schedule. However, I have drawn up a three nap a day schedule which I believe will work better for everyone involved. I would appreciate it if you would take a few minutes to review the notes I have here." I looked over what he had and he was right. Three longer naps were working much better than the current four short ones. So, now that's the plan.

I like to pretend that I have some element of control over what's going on in my household. Really I do. Truth is that I make grand plans and someone else works it out. We all know that most of the time it's God telling me that my schedule just isn't His. Letting go is probably one of my biggest challenges as a Christian and as a human being. God works with me on this one continually.

I'm going to admit now in this very safe little format ... I have no clue what I'm doing as a Mom. If you haven't figured that out yet, I really don't. I'm enjoying every moment of it, but admittedly, I am just along for the ride. However, it's better not to let the world in general know this. If nothing else, if I put on a false bravado, it keeps interfering individuals from giving me reams of unwanted advice. It's really good sometimes to pretend I know what I'm doing. In the interim, I'll go on making up my little schedules and getting things accomplished when I least expect them. For now, that's the plan.

A Hard Day's Play

A perfect moment in time ...

Gabriel's Fashion Parade

My sister has just about every piece of baby clothing known to man. It's true. And they're nice clothes, too. The kind that make you feel like you just stepped into a children's book. So you can imagine how excited I was when my sister generously agreed to allow me to borrow all those darling baby clothes. Although it wasn't a stipulation, she did ask if I would be kind enough to take a few photos of Gabriel wearing said clothes. I kept meaning to do it, kept meaning to email and well ... here I am. In the end, I have decided to post the pictures on my blog instead of sending an email. I figure that it will be quicker, my blog is more able to handle multiple pictures and I will get in my required Gabriel photos. Three in one. Gotta love that. So without further delay, the Gabriel Fashion Parade ...

Gabriel was getting ready for church. Unfortunately, we didn't realize we had dressed him backwards. Ooops!

You'll notice a lot of his pictures are on his changing table. It's because he likes the changing table. Honest. And I like this outfit. So much so that I'm still trying to squeeze him into it even though it looks more like shorts by now.

Oh my ... Well, this was Gabriel just hanging out with me. Needless to say, we don't have to roll up the sleeves on that one anymore and he's getting too long for me to hold him like that.

My family has seen this one before, but it's one of my favorites. Button and I were at the playground and took a few minutes to hang out in the sun in the grass. I actually dressed him in this outfit yesterday. My husband said it's no longer Christmas and I need to stop dressing him in this, but trees are year round, right?

This picture doesn't do the outfit justice. There's little teddy bears on the collar and it's absolutely darling. However, I like this photo of my son on his playmat. He was just figuring out how to lift up his head and shoulders.

Ben swears I torture Gabriel with some of these photos. I thought he looked cute in the bear ears! This is the same outfit as earlier, I just wanted to show you that we can get it on correctly when we focus.

As with most fashion shows you can order any of the outfits shown here by indicating the model number and making checks payable to "Gabriel's College Fund." Oh wait, that's right, these are my sisters and I'm supposed to return them all. Well, let's keep this between just us ... After all, things get lost in the mail all the time, don't they? :)

The Value of a Cabbage

This post was inspired while making dinner the other day. Normally, I do not buy cabbage. Not that I have anything against cabbage, it just doesn't happen to be a food for which I have a lot of use. Plus, while I am breast feeding, it's not the best thing for breast milk. About a week ago, though, I had a craving for fish tacos. I think a friend mentioned them and it sounded so good I decided I wanted fish tacos. I looked up a recipe online and trotted off to the store for some cod and cabbage.

Now it only took about 1/8 of the cabbage to make fish tacos for two people. That leaves a lot of cabbage left over. What to do with all that left over cabbage? Some people may think "just throw it out", but at the price of produce, I just couldn't bring myself to do so. As mentioned earlier, I don't find myself using cabbage a lot, so I was really stumped. Ben came up with the brilliant idea of making stuffed cabbage. Another recipe I've never tried, but how hard could it be? Making stuffed cabbage used up about half of what was left of my leafy vegetable. Good progress and good stuffed cabbage!

I was down to about 1/3 of the original head and still had no idea what to do when someone invited me to a cookout this weekend. Well, what's a cookout without the cole slaw! Perfect. I threw in a carrot, and a few ingredients from the cabinet, and instant bring along dish.

Amazing. For someone who had no use for an entire cabbage, I had now used up the entire head. I couldn't help but think to myself how economical that head of cabbage was. Originally, a lot of vegetable was going to waste and I ended up coming up with three meals for something that cost less than a dollar. Now that's value.

Insalata d'Arancia Rossa

This is a long overdue post to my sister. When we went to the Ricotta Cheese Workshop we finished off the day with lunch. After all, it wouldn't be Italy if the day didn't conclude with a large meal. One of the dishes they served was an orange salad with sausages. My sister had asked me for the recipe for this dish and I have been trying desperately to get it. One of the gentleman here never got back to me on the recipe, but he did disclose that you made an orange salad and added cold sausages to it. That sounds easy enough. I don't have a recipe for orange salad per se, but I do have one for blood orange salad. Here is my stab at the orange and sausage dish. If someone tries it out, let me know how it goes ...

(This is an entirely gratuitous picture of my son which has absolutely nothing to do with the aforementioned recipe. I include it solely because I have been accused of not posting enough pictures of my son. Now, on with the recipe ...)

Sausages and Oranges
Begin by going to your local butcher and buying some good sausages. If you don't have a local butcher ... find one. If you must *sigh* go to the market and buy some sausages from there. It won't be the same, but I suppose one must do what one must. Cook the sausages until nicely browned and cooked through. Allow to cool.

Cut four oranges into bite-sized pieces. Mince two garlic cloves and mix with chopped Italian flat leaf parsley, red pepper flakes and black pepper to taste. Generously drizzle with extra virgin olive oil. Toss.

Arrange sausages on platter. Serve with orange salad on the same platter.